Chivalry: dead, dying or alive? A tale of two genders

His Perspective:
By Patrick Rickles

Chivalry, if it is not dead now, then it is currently coughing up blood. Chivalry seems to be a lost art among many males these days.

Chivalry was originally a code of warfare for medieval knights focusing on honor, bravery and courage. It evolved through the less warlike ages into more of a politeness code for men. Men would hold doors open for women, stand when a woman sits down and tip their hats as well as help women put on their coats. However, in the modern age it seems to have almost disappeared for various reasons.

With the modern feminist movement, most women have embraced their independence and are struggling to be seen as equals. With this new independence, chivalry appears to have been left by the wayside. Women that have embraced their independence do not want to be seen as inferior, and will sometimes lash out at a poor man that is attempting to be polite.

Men that practice chivalry are not typically sexist or bigots in any way, and most simply see it as a way to be polite and respectful to women in general. Men are (as usual) confused about what women want when it comes to chivalry. Men know that women are capable of opening doors, but they want to be helpful and kind and do it for them.

In an age when most people will not even use a basic please or thank you, chivalry is a lost art that is fading fast. Most men want to be able to treat women in general with respect and courtesy that they deserve. Women, please be chivalrous and tell the men of the world what you want us to do.

Her Perspective:
By Aiesha Desarme

There is a man.  Walking, in the same direction as you. There is a door. You are both approaching it. There is an unspoken expectation. He is to hold the door, and perhaps give a light smile or a nod. In turn you are ready with a grateful “Thank You.” He opens the door — but that courtesy is not extended to you. You are stunned, yet not surprised at all. You bitterly think to yourself that indeed, chivalry is dead … or is it?

Many, if not all, are familiar with what is now considered an almost archaic custom — a custom that is slowly dying.  Who might be responsible for its decay? Both men and women from all ethnicities and backgrounds.  We allow gender to dictate the actions of a person. The universal problem is learning how to apply manners in an ever-changing social background. The demand for the level of respect is there, but it is in no way being implemented.  

Dear men: There is absolutely nothing, nothing wrong with being a gentleman. It is not outdated to be courteous and kind to those around you. In addition to that, there is also a mutual level of understanding that many times females are quick to shut the door in the face of men just as they are willing to open them for us.  
Dear women:  The act chivalry is quite hard to sift through when we are dealing with the instilled mindset of strong, independent women. It is confusing and, at times, intimidating to be courteous to someone who may or may not want to receive it. How many times have we, as women, attempted to be courteous? Do we open the door for others or politely give someone a hello like men do? Though gender stereotypes  say that men are expected to  be the “door openers” and the “hat tippers,” women are not excluded from performing similar courtesies. Manners are not a discriminatory thing.  

At the end of the day,chivalry is dying but can be saved if we implement it into our own lives.